daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Rule Two - You do not touch my daughter in front. If you make her cry, I will make YOU cry. Rule Five - In order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, partnersuche transgender and other issues of the day. Remembering how unfairly persecuted I felt when I would pick up my dates, I do my best to make my daughters suitors feel even worse. Rule Six - I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls.
Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Let me elaborate: when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you. Dont you remember being that age?
Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. Is that because youre stupid, or did you merely want to appear stupid? Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka zipped up to her chin. Rule Seven - As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh gta 5 internet dating and fidget. Rule One - If you pull into my driveway and honk youd better be delivering a package, because youre sure as heck not picking anything. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. My motto: wilt them in the living room and theyll stay wilted all night. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. Why do you think I came up with the eight simple rules? Rule Four - Im sure youve been told that in todays world, sex without utilizing a barrier method of some kind can kill you. As a dad, I have some basic rules, which I have carved into two stone tablets that I have on display in my living room.
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